Journey of Love

The Kingdom of Heaven Belongs to Such as These

By: Sr. M. John Paul

“Shh! We need to be quiet to listen to Jesus!” Isaac exclaimed as other 3 year old voices could be heard disturbing the silence which had settled upon the room. I smiled as I sat observing the scene; it reminded me of the words of the prophet Zechariah: “Be silent, all flesh, before the Lord; for He is aroused from His holy Heaven.” (Zc. 2:13) In these holy seasons of Advent and Christmas we are called upon to “keep watch” (Matt 25:13) and be vigilant in seeking the Lord and welcoming Him into our hearts whenever He comes knocking. “There was no room for them in the inn,” (Luke 2:7) scripture tells us, do we have room in our hearts? If so, is a place prepared and ready for our King?
This year I have been given the great gift of making room and preparing a space for God to speak to His people, the littlest people, to whom the Kingdom of God belongs… In March, I was asked to begin making preparations for starting the Catechesis of the Good Shepherd program at our Carmelite Child Development Center, our daycare in Kirkwood. Based on the methods of Maria Montessori, Catechesis of the Good Shepherd seeks to unveil the truth of the Gospel to children through a blending of Sacred Scripture and Liturgy. Children are very tactile learners and love to be independent in their environment. This method uses tangible materials through which children are enabled to integrate the mystery of life and the Incarnation more deeply. This means that we have figures for select passages in the New Testament that highlight the main events of redemption history which the children can work with (we use the word ‘work’ rather than ‘play’ because these are true avenues of prayer in the child) and materials that help bring alive the parables as well as the Holy Mass.



Jesus said: “Let the little children come to me and do not prevent them for the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to such as these.” He didn’t say to show them the way, He said “let” them come. This one word speaks volumes… The human person is a body and soul composite, and children in their innocence are naturally receptive to God’s voice in their lives. Just as I told in the story above about Isaac, he naturally desires to seek communion with God, the living God. He was reminding the other children that in the atrium we keep silence because we want to hear the voice of the Good Shepherd, and Isaac desired to listen to that voice. That story was just one instance of many that have happened within these two months that we have been bringing children to the atrium. All great things start small, so we only have a handful of three year olds coming once a week in small groups to the special room (atrium) prepared for this sacred work; but as time goes on we will incorporate more and more children into the program.
St. John the Evangelist tells us: “Beloved, what was from the beginning, what we have heard, what we have seen with our eyes, what we have looked upon and touched with our hands … what was with the Father and was made visible to us…” (1Jn 1:1-3) “God came into the world! What does this mean?” St. John Paul II asked the crowds in his Christmas Homily of 1968. I wondered with the children this Advent how our great God chose such a little place on our planet to live, die, and rise. Such a little place and all of redemption happened there! The reality is that God comes into this world every day, but do we take the time to notice Him? His healing hands touch our hearts through the sacraments, we hear His voice in the Scriptures, and He reveals His love for us in all those around us and in creation. But let us not pass by the original question: “What does this mean?” What does it mean for humanity? The Saint answers this question by saying: “It means, my dear brothers and sisters, that he came to meet the aspirations imprinted within man to move beyond himself, to obtain more, and to always be something more. … Man can transcend himself through becoming a son of God …” And what does this mean but to accept our identity as children being held in the arms of our Father? Sometimes we are even called to trust when He tosses us up in the air or flies us around like an airplane. Do we have confidence that His hands will never drop us? And even more importantly, can we laugh and smile as He takes us on a crazy ride? Then we can respond to our Father’s caresses with contentment and joy “I love you soooo much!” (As one of the children in the atrium repeated over and over in prayer...) Let us ask Him to shatter our blindness and open our eyes to see His love and providence in all. “See God in all, serve God in all, love God in all!” ~Bl. Mother Maria Teresa of St. Joseph

Poinsettias for Our Lady

By:  Postulant Emma

During Advent, the Sisters pray a Novena leading up to Christmas called “The Journey”.  A beautiful statue of Our Lady visits each sister’s cell for a day.   Every morning the whole community processes through the convent and the sister to receive Mary on that particular day is asked to give our Lady lodging. The night before the journey began I was on stage in our social hall helping a resident get into her angel costume for our residents' Christmas pageant.  She began to tell me about poinsettias that she wanted to give to two particular Sisters. The pageant ended and I told a few sisters about this resident and about the poinsettias she wanted to give us. They excitedly looked at me and said, “We need two poinsettias for the journey, and we didn’t know where we would find some!” At this point, the resident had gone back to her room, so I quickly went upstairs to see if she was still willing to give us the poinsettias. I saw her in the hallway and she graciously showed me to her room and helped me pick out the poinsettias for our Blessed Mother. It was so very providential and she was so grateful that her beautiful flowers were going to be used in such a special way. Jesus wasn’t going to let his Mother be without flowers. He always provides, even in the littlest ways. It was a beautiful reminder and invitation to be attentive and docile to the promptings of the Holy Spirit. The Word made flesh still dwells with us and wants a home in our hearts always. May we be eager to wait with Mary, who so longs to give us her Divine Son. Mary will give us a heart like Jesus’ heart, and He so desires to give us Mary’s heart. Mary, Cause of our Joy, pray for us! 

Sitting at Gate B35...on Purpose

By: Sr. M. Grace Augustine

I remember sitting on my bed as a teenager terribly moody and not terribly committed to un-mood myself. Sound familiar? Finding his daughter in this state, my dad would come into the room, sit down on the bed and ask, “What are you living for?” Purpose is important and the lack thereof can go undetected for years and be the cause of much unrest and confusion. Blessed Chiara Badano (d. 1990) once said, “I’m only interested in doing God’s will, doing that well, in the present moment: playing God’s game.”
One day, my “present moment” found myself in the Kansas City airport en route to a retreat where I was going to give a talk on Bl. Chiara and the Evangelical Counsels. Procrastinator-me decided to begin thinking about the talk at Gate 35B. I wanted to present Bl. Chiara as the athlete that she was, but I needed a story to tie it all together.
“Is this seat open?” I asked two women who were sitting on the other side of a backpack. They smiled and assured me that it was. I pulled out my breviary and prayed Vespers, although I was a little distracted. The young women were wearing athletic attire that looked more legitimate than recreational leisure mode, and I was trying to figure out what sport they played. When I closed the breviary, I asked, “So, do you play basketball?” They smiled and nodded. “College?” “No,” they laughed: “Pro.” I was stunned but freedom of speech quickly returned, and I immediately told them that I was going to give a talk about the Gospel to young women and would really like to ask them some questions. They were happy to help. I asked them why they played basketball, and they both agreed that they loved the sport. I pressed further: “So, why do you love the sport?” One of them responded that she loves to release all her energy on the court and really give everything to the game. I assured them both that I love sports and that I see marks of human excellence in sportsmanship and personal conditioning and then I continued with boisterous bluntness: “Eventually, your body will not be able to play on that court; the aging process will begin. Then, what is the meaning of your life?” One woman sat up a little straighter and commented that it was a good question; the other woman paused for a moment and said with excitement, “But the game continues! Just because you can’t play anymore doesn’t mean that you can’t watch and still live the game.” I was content with their honest responses and decided not to press further for the sake of mental health. We talked about basketball until I needed to find supper. When Kree and Tethe commented that it was crazy that we had met, I assured them that the Holy Spirit was alive in my life and theirs and that the encounter was no accident.
As I returned to B35 for boarding, Tethe yelled across the gate, “Sister, we have something for you!” I looked up to see Kree holding up a t-shirt from the national tournament they had been participating in that weekend. Thanking them, I told them that I would raffle it off to the girls during the talk and asked if they had a Sharpie so that they could autograph it. I retrieved a blue Sharpie from the airline officer at the counter and enjoyed watching Kree and Tethe write their autographs and other graphics on the t-shirt. Noticing that my flight was almost entirely boarded, I went to return the Sharpie but grabbed the Today’s Missal out of my backpack on my way. I hurriedly found the page with the Gospel for the following day: the Multiplication of the Loaves. I ripped it out and wrote in blue Sharpie: “Here lies true greatness. Go Oakland Rise! Hope to see you in Heaven! Prayers!” The Sharpie was handed back to the airline officer. As I grabbed my backpack to head through the Jetway, I handed the Gospel to Kree with the words, “See you in Heaven.” Even though Tethe and Kree may not yet realize their true purpose, they helped me to understand a bit of mine as a Carmelite Sister of the Divine Heart of Jesus. In her Autobiography, Bl. Maria Teresa of St. Joseph, while listing the three purposes of our Congregation, writes, “First: as Atonement” (p.44). Before my Gate B35 present moment, I would often read this as overwhelming, daunting or maybe depressing. Our Constitutions declare something beautiful and freeing when they say, “In this sense do we understand atonement: as being open to the inspirations of the Holy Spirit, as the true knowledge of Christ and as the transforming power of love with which we courageously bear the trials of life and which covers a multitude of sins” (Par. 33).
God allows that encounters at airport gates, daycare lunch tables, college classrooms, nursing home hallways and every other place can become vehicles where mankind can participate in His own salvific work by being open to the inspirations of the Holy Spirit. Bl. Chiara’s words above are mere echoes of Christ’s own mission: “Father, into your hands, I commend my Spirit.” After all, it was that salvific spiration which made it possible for us to respond to the inspirations of the Holy Spirit in the present moment…on purpose…in atonement. So, in the words of my dad, “What are you living for?”

Gift from Venezuela

“What unites us all…is our shared grace and mission, the unique charism of our Carmel D.C.J. We are all Sisters and with all we are at home,” states our Constitutions. What a blessing and marvel it is to encounter a Sister from across an ocean or from a different continent whom you’ve never encountered before, who serves souls day in and day out whom you’ve never met, in a cultural context unlike your own, but whose aspirations, longings, and experiential knowledge of God echo your own aspirations, longings, and knowledge of the God who longs for us more than we long for Him. This is one of the unique blessings of an international congregation.
For the past several weeks our Sisters in Kirkwood have had the immense pleasure of a visit from our Venezuelan Sister, Sr. Maria de Jesus. Her playful spirit and wisdom have been a gift to community life, while her stories of the strife and sacrifices that our Sisters and the Venezuelan people suffer daily have been a sobering reality. It has been a call to draw ever closer to the pierced heart of Christ, interceding and sacrificing for His people, while feeling with Him just a tiny prick of the pain His heart feels in the face of His people’s suffering. Following is an account of Sr. Maria de Jesus from May:
“Talking about the situation in our country makes my heart cringe. Thanks be to God we are all okay because we have everything, thanks to Mother who helps us monthly, but, at the same time, we suffer because our people have a lot of needs. Here we need water, light, food, medicine, transportation. In short, we no longer know how much more our Father God has for us. We are surviving all of this with the hope that one day a change will come for our Venezuela.



Sisters, it has not been easy. We have been many months without water. We have to buy water weekly to be able to keep working with the children. It is sad when people come to us asking for some water to drink. The teachers sometimes tell me, “Sister I bathed with a bottle of water to be able to come to the daycare to work, and that's because the neighbor gave me a little water.” . . .
A week ago we were without electricity in Venezuela for several days. That was terrible because we had to see how to keep the food. It was horrible the amount of people looking for gasoline for their cars. They started to fight and say bad words. It was terrifying. After two days the worst began for our city. They started looting everything and the saddest is that they destroyed all the stores and damaged everything so that they would never work again. Those days were horrible. There were many shots, confrontations, people running, looking for food, dead and wounded people. We did not have peace.
Then we had a week without being able to buy anything. Everything was looted and closed. People could not get food. Thanks be to God I had bought food for the children the day they took out the energy. We helped some families with food and we prepared food packages for our workers, and with this little help that we gave them, they could eat some days.
This has been a lot of suffering for our people and for us. We have kept standing thanks to your prayers, and the trust we have in God. May God have mercy on our people and may we have a new Venezuela. I believe that we have suffered a lot and we deserve something better, but, that, God’s will be done.
Sisters, it is a daily struggle to survive in Venezuela. Please keep praying for us.”

EASY AS 1, 3, 2: MONOTHEISM, TRINITY AND HYPOSTATIC UNION

Carmelite Day 2018

Early June found us Carmelites basking in the sun...or were we dripping with water?  You may have thought that becoming a Sister meant absolutely no fooling around.  Well, think again!  As Pope Emeritus Benedict the XVI has said..."He takes nothing away and He gives you everything" ...even water balloon fights.

In the Right Place

As I drove to the retreat the evening of May 24th, I wasn’t quite sure what to expect. I was looking forward to getting the chance to meet more young women who were also discerning God’s call for them, and of course I was excited to get to know the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus, as well. In these moments before the retreat began, I could never have guessed the beautiful experiences I was able to have over the next few days. As I arrived and anxiously greeted some fellow retreatants, my heart was filled with joy and my nervousness began to be replaced with warm happiness. The retreat opened with prayer and welcome, and one of the sisters reminded us to go through this retreat knowing that God had placed us here for a reason, and that through it all his gentle love would guide us. We then prayed compline (the night prayer of the liturgy of the hours) with the sisters, and as we headed to bed, I still had a million questions in my mind about if I was in the right place or doing the right thing, or even of I was worthy to be there. God would not answer these questions in a flash of lightening or a heavenly vision, but through the gentle promptings and experiences of the coming days.

The next morning, we opened with lauds and meditation, and I looked to the days ahead, I simply asked our Lord to make His will mine, and to give me the courage to hear His voice more clearly. After breakfast, as we watched a vocational film and listened to the unique and beautiful vocation stories of the sisters, my heart was pulled to the life I was hearing about. “I want to live for you, just like that, Jesus!” I prayed. As we continued through out day and got to experience a little taste of the Sisters' apostolate, I found my heart open to a central part of the Sisters' lives and exactly how they lived for Jesus as I so longed to. Seeing firsthand how the sisters cared for both the residents of St. Agnes Home and the children at the day care, I saw a type a motherhood I’d never fully recognized: spiritual motherhood. The way that the Sisters interacted with and cared for the residents of St. Agnes Home was truly the same as how I love and care for my own grandparents, and the way they played with and so dearly loved the children at the day care reminded me of the relationship I have with my own older sisters. The sisters loved and made a home for everyone they served, with the light of Christ so clearly touching others through their service. That evening as we prayed vespers and then shared recreation time all together, I felt the peace and love between the sisters permeate my heart and the hearts of the retreatants, and I began to understand that not only are the sisters spiritual mothers, they are a spiritual family unto each other as well. 

The next day, as we had the privilege to attend the ordination mass for priests at the Saint Louis Basilica, and we learned more about Carmelite spirituality and the history of Carmel DCJ, I saw that religious life is not only one of love and sacrifice: it is a life full of the beauty of God. It is a life full of relationships, service, prayer, community, solitude, and bringing the souls of the world closer to the Lord. Learning an introduction to how Carmelite spirituality is lived revealed to me how deeply important the silence of prayer is, as well as how powerful. And attending the ordination mass, as well as some amazing conversations I had with the sisters throughout this weekend exposed to me one very important truth: Religious life isn’t about being worthy or doing things right all the time – it is about answering a call. As we had mass the next morning, on the closing day of the retreat, I knew I had been in the right place, and that I would remember this weekend for years to come. 

 - Reflection from a SLU grad

The Divine Invitiation

By: Sr. Mary Michael

The Easter season is one of my favorite times of the year.  This is not due solely to the fact that we can eat chocolate at breakfast, dinner, and supper (part of a certain convent tradition), though that is an amazing gift from Jesus!  It is also because I love the Mass readings that the Church gives us to contemplate, which are so incredibly beautiful and intimate.  

Just recently I was discussing the gospel for Divine Mercy Sunday with our lay staff from our daycare center.  We reflected on ‘Doubting Thomas’ a bit until eventually one of them remarked, “If someone just appeared here and said, ‘I’m God.  Believe in me.’ I wouldn’t believe them.  I don’t blame the apostles for being slow to believe.”  It’s hard to illustrate the full effect for you in a short little article, but with that, I felt like Jesus on the road to Emmaus with the two disciples.  My heart was burning with the desire to open the scriptures (or simply Truth) to them.  “You are so right and justified in saying that!” I said.  “That’s exactly why Jesus doesn’t do that to us, nor did He make that demand up His apostles.  Instead, He spent three years revealing Himself to them!”  

God desires relationship.  It wasn’t solely in that split second in the upper room that Jesus revealed Himself to His disciples, nor was His revelation limited to His awe-inspiring miracles or profound words.  In everything that He did He revealed His Heart and the love of the Father - every look that He gave, every smile that played on His lips, every one of His actions.  He desired that the disciples come to know Him, and through this intimate knowledge of Him, to come to trust Him and believe in Him.  

And so it is the same with us.  Jesus is unceasingly inviting us to encounter Him in the scriptures and in the sacraments.  He invites us to recognize His intimate presence in all of the events of daily life.  He invites us to share our hearts with Him and listen to the response of His Heart in personal prayer each and every day.  He invites us to come to know Him, to grow in relationship with Him, to receive Him in His longing for us, and then to let Him transform us through our trust in His word.  He invites us to trust that He is God, He is faithful, and He is the fulfillment of all our desires.  

As we continue to contemplate the scriptures this Easter season may we not only pray, “Stay with us Lord,” as did the disciples on the road to Emmaus, for He is always with us.  He does not leave us.  It is we who get distracted and leave Him.  Thus, may we hear His gentle plea borne of His longing and intense desire for us – “Stay with me!  Abide in me.”  May we resolve all the more firmly to respond to this intimate divine invitation.

"Can We Keep Talking About Jesus?"

Amidst the buzzing of technological distractions today, one might say we have muted Christ’s knocking on our hearts. It was not until giving up my own “beloved” Android Samsung, that I was able to see just how often I was running from silence by checking it all throughout the day. How long, I wondered, has Jesus been waiting to enter the silence of my heart, just for me to turn away and check my phone? With this in mind, I couldn’t help but worry, how will children search for Christ in a world that offers so many distractions? Only a few weeks in our Carmelite Child Development Center proved to me that Christ goes much deeper than the distractions of the world. One encounter I had speaks for them all. While working on an art project, a few children had crowded around my lap and began asking questions about the crucifix around my neck – nothing new. “Why did Jesus want to die for us?” and “How can I be better friends with Jesus?” were only a few of their remarks. All the while, one little girl, “Ruth”, gently held the little cross in her hands, gazing at it intently. Eventually the questions ceased, the children returned to their play, and I refocused my attention to the painting station. Without noticing that Ruth was still hanging on to the crucifix around my neck, I continued directing the project. After a great silence passed Ruth finally looked up, “Sister,” she asked quietly, “Can we keep talking about Jesus? I like it and I really want to know more.” Such sincere words! Suddenly all the children painting had stopped to listen to me, eagerly waiting to hear more about Jesus. How beautiful it is to witness the joy of little ones seeking to know Christ. Is this not the cry of each of our hearts? Lord, help me to desire to befriend you, just like your little ones at Carmelite.

-Postulant Therese

...And the Word was Made Flesh

"Glory to the Newborn King!” “God is with us, Emmanuel.” “God to sinners reconciled.” For me, expressions like these used to be largely reminiscent of lyrics to Christmas songs growing up. That’s all the deeper it went. It was a song to sing at Christmastime, and, when the songwriter must’ve really thought about it, it often rhymed. It just “fit” nicely. But let’s take a   moment and ponder one of these lines: “God is with us…” Do we even fathom what that means for us? God Himself became man for our sake. He came as a tiny baby to live and die with us and for us, like one of us in all things except sin. What a tremendous mystery! God so loved us that He chose to send His only son for us, born in humble lowliness, unrecognizable except to the eyes of faith.

Here in the convent, we live Advent and Christmas differently from the world. When we sing, we anticipate the mystery of the Incarnation with these eyes of faith. What a privilege it is to truly enter into the Liturgical seasons to prepare our hearts for Christ. Advent is no exception. While much of the world is busy “shopping till they drop,” finding the perfect present, and    taking pictures with Santa, we are focused solely on the coming of Christ into our hearts. Christmas in the convent is one of the most    beautiful experiences. Yes, there is a time for all the fun of the season, but we save it for the time it is liturgically celebrated. There is true joy, anticipation, prayer, and focus on the coming of Christ. I think sometimes in this world we miss out on many things because we are so focused on the hype of the season. Christmas exists as a holiday because of Jesus Christ’s coming to earth as man. Many times I see bumper  stickers at this time of year that say, “Keep Christ in Christmas”. Yes, indeed, let us not remove Him from the feast that belongs to Him from its existence!         

Recently in a meeting I had with a priest, I brought up the idea that at times I just feel plain inadequate. We all feel that way sometimes, don’t we? During this Advent,  I was invited to counter that lie with truth found in prayer. I hope you can too! Here is what I mean: We need to hear from our Lord that the lie of our inadequacy is from the Evil One. God comes to bring us the knowledge that we are deeply loved by Him. We need to counter the lies because we are so precious to the  Father that He sent Jesus to us as a tiny vulnerable baby, as God, to be one with us. That is love! This priest also told me that to the eyes of many, Baby Jesus seemed “inadequate.” He  didn’t seem to be “enough” to save His people. But it is precisely through this littleness and vulnerability that He conquered. The devil is always afraid of truth, humility, littleness, and simplicity! I was invited to ponder the Christmas crèche at Christmas Eve, to look at the Baby Jesus. He, too, didn’t seem like “enough” to save the world. But, oh, how He was! One day, many years ago, there was a Virgin who gave birth to the Savior of the World, and His name is Jesus. Let us never   forget such tremendous love. Indeed, this Love is more than enough. The beautiful truth is that it also makes us more than enough in His precious eyes! We are loved!